Put A Little Trust to Strangers

Friday, about 1:04 in the afternoon I found myself hanging alone in my pad. This life I’m living is a bit boring. I remember just about two days ago when I bought myself two books to read just to eat up my time. And now reading wont satisfied my weary heart and lousy mind. I end up roaming EDSA Central for a vacant internet café. Well, surfing the net expensive just to have fun.
Never a second will I ever missed to check who or what’s on my left and right or front and back, in other word assuring “preventative measure”. I am used to remind myself to “Trust No One” or else you’ll be in danger. Not even the Security Guard or Policeman standing along sidewalks. Not the dispatcher or known as barker.
To me, strangers might be one of the villain who laugh out loud while watching their victims die in pain and anguish, what if I’m their next target (wahhhh am I overreacting?). So BEWARE of beast around this city of sin.
After 4 hours of searching jobs over the net I decided to go home. While standing in the line waiting for jeepney’s to arrive, a woman just next to me bump against my back. I turned around as I laid my eyes angrily but she was lying helpless on that cold flat surface in the middle of the crowd. I was so shocked even with some books in my hands I pulled her towards a wall where she can lean her back. Just about 5 seconds she responded to people asking what happened to her. To my surprise someone gave bottled water, another offered menthol to relax her nerves a bit and another offered the woman something to eat.
I am speechless then I heave a sigh. You can never be alone bleeding to death because those angels do exist on earth just disguised in those strangers I called just a while ago “villain”.

BUT let me remind you "JUST A LITTLE TRUST".

Never Let You Go

“I’ll send Johan to Bulan if you won’t give up on that job.” He uttered angrily as he tried to compose himself beside me. We’re inside the bus line on our way home. While I am staring blankly at the rain outside the window, I chew in every word of that thing he spit on me. Is he trying to help me out of the career burden and miseries or trying to blackmail me. That was 2 years ago. He knew from the start that Johan is my only reason why I strived so hard. That even now I think he is so sure I might break myself into pieces losing my baby. I knew he can have all the possibilities and help just to have Johan while watching me fall down slowly. I must prepare myself for that.
I am so sure or just maybe I don’t trust that guy anymore that even if he didn’t mean to scare me or threatened me, still I won’t let Johan stay in his custody. Or I am just desperate to keep my baby all through my life. I have nothing now but One. My prince is the only thing I can hold on to. I am beginning to act so selfish this time coz I need to.
What else I might share when I don’t have any, I wished he can give a little of his understanding. But I doubt it.
I wished I could ask him to let me go. But again I doubt it.
I am waiting for another day that God might hear my prayers. Land a job so I can provide Johan’s needs.

I’m pushing myself, trying to take everything positively.

Figure 1 angel’s watching mommy as he posed for a shot